How to Tackle Racism in Your Relationship

Finding someone who loves and adores you should be the happiest point in your life, and for many people, it is.

However, those who embark on an interracial relationship are not always as fortunate.

There are certain stigmas that come with different races due to both socioeconomic perspectives and the representation of racial differences in movies and television shows. Even the most open minded individual is likely to prejudge someone based on this “information”. When it comes to relationships, this can mean that your friends and family might not be as open and welcoming to a new love interest that shares a skin tone other than yours. Fighting racism that surrounds your relationship can be stressful and have a negative impact on your blossoming love. Here are a few steps to tackling this problem head on and letting your love flourish.

Set Ground Rules

Speak openly with your family and friends who are against your relationship and establish ground rules or etiquette you would like them to maintain in the presence of your partner. This plays to the old adage “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all”. Make it clear that you want your relationship to be respected and welcomed. If they are unable to do accommodate that then you are happy to eliminate them from the situation.

2. Keep Your Relationship Close

Our share-it-all world loves to broadcast how happy we are in love all over social media. When things go south, our friends and family are the first we call and hear “I told you so.” Relationships can be complicated as the needs of each and every one of us is also complex. When you are in a relationship, you go-to person should be your partner. Avoid spreading any negative views in the heat of the moment to those who do not support your relationship. This only fuels their dislike and can be counterproductive to your hopes of their acceptance.

Surround Yourself with Like-minded Individuals

The best way to feel supported in your relationship is to surround yourself with those who you don’t have to hide it from. Look in your area for local meetups for biracial couples or even venture to events that cater to a specific race or culture. You are more likely to find individuals who share your opinions and views, as well as offer up their own advice for tackling those hurdles that come with your unique love.

Build a Strong Foundation

In order for any relationship to survive, it needs a strong foundation. This is no more true than it is when you are part of a biracial relationship. Building a strong foundation consists of a few key elements:

Open communication.

Discuss your problems, struggles, and opinions not only in love and in life. This helps keep the communication flowing and will help establish trust – one of the pillars of a good relationship.


Partners have to be able to depend on each other for support. There is no doing-it-alone when it comes to love. Choosing to be together means choosing to help each other through the good and the bad.


Be honest not only with yours but with your intentions.

The thing to remember is that love comes in all colors, shapes, and sizes. There is no wrong way to love and be loved. If your interracial relationship brings you the happiness you are seeking then that is all that matters.